Hiding in my own house

Yesterday was my 9 year old daughter's birthday. Or maybe yesterday it was my 8 year old daughter's birthday. Either way, she's 9 now and was 8 a couple of day's ago.

Today, Saturday, we had her birthday party. Mostly family and 4 girls from her class. Very nice girls, friendly, smart, and all confident and very polite. This is the first time I've met these girls and I'm glad to know that my daughter has such nice friends. But the news is not all good.

They're sleeping over tonight. A slumber party of 4th graders, in my living room. And I'm trapped hiding in my office. I want to go to bed, but I know they won't so I can't. The ruler of the roost, master of all I see, hiding from 9 year olds. Nice 9 year olds, but scary at the same time.

Every time I walk through the room, one of them tries to show me some amazing talent. It's late and they've already passed the sillies. I was hoping the next phase was sleep but it's not. The next phase is showing off. I've seen how good one of the girls is at making spring sounds with her mouth. I've seen how good another can touch her elbows together behind her back. Not to be outdone, her twin sister can do the same. Another can really spread her toes wide, another can point her big toe in an opposite direction of the others. If could do any of these things, I'd keep it to myself. I try to be encouraging and kind with phrases like "Way to go...touching your elbows together....that'll get you far." and "Nice freaky toes...way to hustle". But they see through it. They see my deer in the headlights stare as I look around for a way out. I think they're just messing with me.

So, here I am hiding in my office, posting because I've already read the whole internet to pass the time and I've run out of things to do.